I totally didn’t come back the next day, huh. I just got pulled into the other project I wanted to work on, which feels like a totally great reason. My only rule is to make something every day and share it. I did that. I do that. I rarely don’t do that at all. I do love writing though, and I love writing here. Anyway, enough of the meta. The meta is boring, right?
I was struck by a thought this week that made me feel a sort of way: I always assume I’m going to do a bad job, and I mostly think that I’ve done a bad job, even if evidence points to the contrary. I should probably speak to a therapist about that rather than write about it on the internet, but what’s that internet meme again? I approve of therapy, to be clear. I spent months in therapy. I think most people probably should.
The small project I kicked off felt pretty good immediately, though. I felt like I was doing a pretty good job. I didn’t totally hate the results. Maybe because it’s new. Maybe because I made the stakes intentionally low. I wonder how I could feel like that about everything? I think I’ve felt that way before. Maybe I’m just going through a moment. I should note that it’s not a very dramatic moment. Too familiar for that.
This is a bit of an experiment I think of writing morning-pages style stuff here. I didn’t plan to write what I’m writing. I’m not sure why I’m still typing, other than inertia. It feels good-bad, but maybe I’ll carry on. Today I felt like this, tomorrow I might feel elated. Such is the human experience (I think). I’ll wrap it up here. Good enough for now.